The Horse in Striped Pajamas
(Golden Records, 1959)
Hey! Hey! Hey!
I'm finally back!
Today, it's time for happy fun time. Or, more accurately, happy hands time. Now, maybe it's just the dirty perv that lives in my brain, but
Happy Hands is a rather suggestive song title, in my opinion.
I'm sure it's all completely innocent, but still . . .
my brother's hands are working fits rhythmically much better than
my brother's hands are masturbating. Of course,
my brother's hands are sinning would fit, but perhaps the good Captain was wise enough to know that 99% of males beat off, and the other 1% are either lying, in comas, or bereft of hands. Not even sad hands.
But we must also take into account the fact that the Captain's viewing audience, which once included lil' ol' [young] me, was a bit young to be risking impotence and insanity, via the dread evil that is self-pleasure.
On a personal note, our TV died one morning while I was eating breakfast and watching Captain Kangaroo. It was quite traumatic. I was two or three years old at the time, and still remember the screen unexpectedly going dead black.
For those too young and/or gaijin to know who the heck Captain Kangaroo was, he was Bob Keeshan, the titular host of a long-running morning TV show that I adored. The best parts were when Mr. Moose would dump copious deluges of ping pong balls on the Captain, and when the mysterious Dancing Bear would appear for a few moments to dance for us.